Storm Barbara became the UK’s FIRST imaginary storm, as a 9:30am, London-to-Glasgow, Virgin train’s tannoy announced that winds were restricting its speed.
“Can you see a tree moving?” exclaimed one passenger, in response to the reverentially Dianarist hush with which precautions were announced to reduce the notional tempest’s supposed threat to life.
The damp gloom’s sulky still – whose gentle drizzle smeared the tilting windows, yet left all but the smallest tree twigs unmoved – highlighted the inherent stupidity of a group-think paralysed bureaucracy: one perfectly at home on a train run by entrepreneur-turned-unctuous-globalist Richard Branson.
Copyright TruthExcites, 2016